Being a career-focused, independent woman will lead to psychological disorders only curable by banging a Scotsman who should have been allowed to use his native accent since it slips out all the time anyway. Being a human sex toy for your man will transform you into the obedient, servile Stepford Slut every guy wants and deserves. Lighten up you uptight bitch, and unfurl your skank flag!

The Moral Of... sprang forth fully-formed from the head of a post I made to my Twitter feed.